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maniacalrage:

Creepy Host of “Just Like Mom” Fergie Oliver Kisses Little Girls

I know it was the 80s and all, but I can’t believe no one stopped this from happening. When a contestant on your show calls you a “dirty old man” off camera and THEY AIR IT, you know things are bad. Pretty sure the pitch meeting for this show went something like this:

• Fergie Oliver: “Hey, I’ve got a perfect idea for a show, guys. I’ll host the show and we’ll have lots of little girls on it. And I’ll kind of just keep kissing them.”
• Producer: “Wait, what’s the point of the show?”
• Fergie Oliver: “They answer questions.”
• Producer: “Yeah, but that other part—about kissing little girls?”
• Fergie Oliver: “All the contestants will be little girls.”
• Producer: “Right…”
• Fergie Oliver: “So then I kiss them and ask them questions.”
• Producer: “Wait, I still don’t understand why you’re kissing them.”
• Fergie Oliver: “What do you mean?”
• Producer: “Why are you kissing these little girls?”
• Fergie Oliver: “Because they’re the contestants.”
• Producer: “I know they’re the contes—seriously, you’re talking about kissing underage girls on television? Don’t you think that’s gonna be an issue?”
• Fergie Oliver: “I don’t understand the question.”
• Producer: “Fine, whatever, do the show.”